By Six
Why am I called Six?
Six is a perfect number.
In numerology and Judaism, six is associated with love, care and creativity.
Six is a lucky number in Chinese business communities. Six means a steady cash flow.
Six is referenced in the Holy Bible as the symbol of balance, new beginnings, forgiveness and objectivity. God created the universe in six days.
Six is about objectivity.
Besides, when you introduce yourself as Paul, people quickly forget your name.
When you are introduced as Six, people remember you.
People have shared their stories with me over four seasons of K’ Road Chronicles.
Now, in our final season, I fell I have an obligation to share at least part of my story with you.
My family is usually very private, and I had to ask all of them for permission to write this.
To a passive observer, I was a loner. I didn’t even engage with my sister. Today I guess they might suggest I was on the spectrum.
At the time, I think they just called me batshit crazy.
I was born Paul Dermont Kendon on 4 June 1970.
My father abandoned me and my sister when I was an infant. I never met him until years later. He was a petty criminal and thug. I mean, if you’re going to commit a life of crime, be a decent thief. Rob banks, casinos, race tracks or bars. Not old ladies and other unsuspecting pensioners.
He died a couple of years ago.
My mum and stepfather are good people and gave me and my sister a healthy start in life.
Although I knew I was transgender from the crib, I also worked out fairly quickly that having a dick came with privileges.
Not only could I stand to pee, but I also had my own room and freedom to come and go, which my sister envied.
My mum taught me to be resourceful. My stepfather taught me perseverance. My sister taught me how to dance.
This episode includes Paige, my daughter.
Paige taught me how to love.
Paige was the reason I had to come out.
She was only a year old when I realised I couldn’t continue living a lie. I didn’t want my relationship with her mother to be the model for her own future relationships.
Paige’s mum and I had a relationship built on money. Maybe once there was love. But to me, it just felt like a financial arrangement. I was trying so hard to live up to everyone else’s expectations that I forgot who I was.
I walked away from a loving relationship, a house by the beach, a rental property and a corporate gig with nothing.
Paige’s mum is a good person. I’m eternally sorry I wasn’t the person she deserved.
Although I owned two houses, I was sleeping in my car.
Until now, I have never spoken publicly about my daughter.
This K’ Road Chronicles episode is a rare insight into my life, my family, and my motivation.
I didn’t really want to film this episode, but Ella Wells, our director, has crafted a sincere and sympathetic day in my life.
I hope someone out there finds courage from this episode to be their true self.
The most powerful thing you will ever be is authentic.
I created the K’ Road Chronicle paper.
This was adapted into the multi-award-winning K’ Road Chronicles web series
I now produce the award-winning K’ Road Chronicle podcast.
My mum always told me I could do anything.
So I decided to do everything.
Be authentic.
Be you.
Be.
Produced by Magnetic Pictures for TP+
Marketing support from Woolworths NZ
Made with the support of NZ On Air
